Dating while having cancer
I really don't know what I might be getting myself into.I want to try it out because I think she's a wonderful woman and we could make each other happy.However I made the statement without fully comprehending the severity of her illness (being only hours after she told me).I guess my stand is that I would like the relationship to escalate and see what potential is there.I understand the need for love and a partner, but I don't know if she's being entirely fair with you. Thank you for this advice, it is good to hear someone say it. She has already been rejected by others because of it. I want her to have more, but I know that will be at great cost to myself.It puts an immense burden on a relationship and makes everything so dramatic and intense. I know she's thinking she's giving you a free choice; but to be honest, it's so loaded. It makes me sick to my stomach though that she be condemned by this illness to a fate of loneliness. And perhaps that is not a healthy dynamic in a relationship.And perhaps you could stay instead in the role of a good friend rather than a romance, where you can be there for her, but are not responsible to be there in a constantly by her side role.But above all, be honest about your feelings with her.
I feel I have much more to consider than my own feelings and happiness.
If you are uncertain you can handle it, then tell her.
If i were terminally ill and had only dated someone a few weeks, i would not expect them to commit to that journey unless they wanted to, and at the same time i would be angry if they made a shallow commitment to be there for me as a partner, then bailed out when the going got rough.
But on the other hand, I have never dealt with cancer personally, nor have I ever lost anyone really close because of it.
But I also feel at this point, since she has revealed to me her illness, that it is upon me to make a potentially life changing decision right now and either put all my chips in or leave the table.So if she doesn't want to feel alone, she can join the many, many support groups and services offered for cancer patients and survivors.